When things are right between us it feels so good...when they aren't it goes so horribly wrong...wtf?

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Summer Olympics 2012!!!

What takes over my life for two weeks every four years? The Summer Olympics of course! I love the Olympics b/c of the spirit behind it. To me (and I think the rest of the world too) the olympics are about being on an even playing field and universal commadarie. For two weeks every four years we set aside our wars and our differences and just try make our countrymen proud. In addition most of the athletes are amped to meet and compete against their idols or people who are generally important to their respective sport. This year was especially awesome for me because this is the first Olympics in history (thirty games thus far) where every country has sent a woman delegate. Keep making strides world!!!! So being Jamaican I generally always watch the track and field events if nothing elses,this year I decided I was going to watch as much of the televised events as I possibly could. Its been pretty cool because I think I have seen just about every event from Judo to Shooting to Archery to ...
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Decide

The past few weeks I've been having various versions of the same dream. Something happens tragically to J (death, injury, disappearance) and I am not only witnessing it I can't stop it from happening. However, I still try to. I scream, I fight, I look for help, every time and it's always the same outcome. His demise and my sorrow. I mentioned it casually to my therapist who pretty much posed the question: what am I not talking about to him? What am i holding on to that is manifesting in this way? Tonight, he came home after a night out. He was loud, he brought home some folx he'd just met and though he did apologize for not warning me and for the disturbance, he didn't adjust his behavior.  That's when it hit me (well technically 3 hours later when I couldn't sleep) it's the constant lack of consideration and thinking of me (and by extension my needs) that I afford to him. If I've come in from being out...I tiptoe in. I barely turn on lights. I get u...
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20/20 Vision

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ah yes, the time had come to once again by reflective. I said I wasn't going to do this, that I would rather not cave into the trend but as I looked at others I realized...this is more than a new year...it's a NEW Decade!!! I should take time to reflect not only on the past year but also on the past 10. So let's try to do that together shall we? 2009: Graduated from VT and started my Disney Career after some time spent abroad, am I ready for this?  2010: Made some personal revelations about life & love and what those meant to me, moved to Atlanta, started my career,  lived completely alone for the first time, really felt like an adult making decisions for myself  2011: Really started exploring my new home, got my first road dog Lord Jaymeson bka LJ, had some friends get married, started working on friendships more 2012: Started traveling domestically more, met J, first (of many) music festival, really started to grow in my career 2013: Promoted!! More live...
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